There are many ways to explain marketing. Some use models, others PowerPoint. We prefer football, parties, and a healthy dose of cheekiness.
Here’s a creative twist on a company defeat — and perhaps the most direct (pun intended) introduction to the many faces of marketing. Happy Friday!
An annual football match was arranged between the company’s marketing department and support department.
The day came, and despite their best efforts, the marketing team was completely crushed by support.
But true to the spirit of marketing, the marketing department refused to let a little defeat ruin their morale. They did what they do best — put a positive “spin” on the outcome.
The next day, the following announcement appeared on the notice board:
“The marketing department is proud to announce that we finished the football season in a solid second place, after only one loss all season. The support department, however, had a weak season — they only won one game.”
And if you’re still unsure what marketing is really about — relax. Let’s take it from the top.
Here’s a simple (and slightly cheeky) guide to the different disciplines of marketing:
Direct Marketing
You’re at a party and see an attractive person across the room. You walk up and say:
“Hi, I’m really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Advertising
You’re at a party and see an attractive person. You give your friend a hundred bucks. They walk over and say:
“Hey, my friend over there is really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Telemarketing
You’re at a party and see an attractive person. You somehow get their phone number, call them later, have a long, charming conversation, and then suddenly say:
“Hi, I’m really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Customer Relationship Management (CRM)
You’re at a party and see an attractive person. You already know them, so you walk over, chat a bit, make them laugh, and then say:
“Hi, I’m really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Strategic Marketing
You’re at a party and see an attractive person across the room.
You stand tall, speak gently and confidently, hold the door open for people, smile like a dream, and create an aura of trust.
And just when their guard is down, you say:
“Hi, I’m really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Social Media Marketing
You take a picture of yourself at a party, post it on Tinder, and wait for someone to reach out. When they do, you say:
“Hi, I’m really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
Branding
You’re at a party and see an attractive person. But you don’t have to do anything — they come up to you and say:
“Hey, I heard you’re really good in bed — want to give it a try?”
And that, my friend, is branding.
